Angelic. Foster. Ruin.

Recently, I was part of a very interesting discussion that has stayed on my mind for many days about what power we give others to dictate who and what we are supposed to be.  Combined with a line from Julius Caesar ("I know he would not be a wolf, But that he sees the Romans are but sheep" Cassius, Act 1, Scene 3), and a study I read about how if dogs are electrocuted inside a cage, with no way to escape, when the cage is taken away they still stand and endure the pain rather than fleeing because they have been conditioned to believe there is no escape, the problems of much of modern society have been on my mind a lot.  Real people are destroyed every day by those who tell others that what they are isn't good enough.  Measuring up today means fitting a mold instead of reaching new heights.  No one really wants to be different, because you don't have to be accountable for what you do if everyone else is doing it too.  Anyone who does want to doesn't, because they feel like there is no point: they are dogs being shocked every day.  I do not want to be the kind of person that can't see what is right and wrong until a tragedy takes place.  I do not want to be the reason that someone falls instead of flies.  I don't have any of the answers, but I know that in myself I can't risk being afraid to take off the mask of "normal" that I hide behind.  Maybe it starts small - with one person, one family, one school, one community - but good can be just as infectious as bad.  Maybe if we stop worrying about whether our own mask is on straight and instead focus as much love and compassion on others as we can, things will change.  Just a bit of rambling thought.  I hope that you enjoyed Angelic. Foster. Ruin :)

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When Words Cannot Be Written

In recent months, I have stopped writing.  Not all together, of course - books full of essays on nuclear chemistry and abnormal developmental psychology and anarchy and freedom.  But nothing has really inspired me, or at least I haven't been able to express them adequately.  I failed the words.  But however awkwardly and painfully, I'm going to bring them back.  In the mean time, I've been expressing myself in a different median - dance choreography.  When I try to write, what I really see is movement.  Now all that's left to do is pin that feeling down onto paper.  I hope you enjoyed When Words Cannot Be Written :)

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